How To Live Your Life Like A Horny Male Writer Is Profiling You
over 1 year ago
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"Have a flaw, but a hot flaw. Horny middle-aged writers want to feel as though their attraction to 20-year-old actresses is an act of charity, so it’s important to cultivate a flaw that men can generously overlook. Obviously, it can’t be something gross or unattractive. How about a voice that’s so soft it requires him to lean closer you, or a frame so small and vulnerable that you constantly seem in danger, or freckles?"
"Resemble food as much as possible. Male writers love to compare women to food, and why wouldn’t they? When dressing, grooming, and presenting yourself, try to channel berries, cake, cream, honey, and even pie. Ideally, your theoretical Vanity Fair profile would also be suitable for publication in Bon Appetit. You are a very appetizing subject!"
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