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Гугл - единственная компания, которая звонит посередине рабочего дня узнать, не хочу ли я поменять работу. Счас, митинг закончу и поменяю.

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Да ладно, можно не заканчивать. "Всё, пацаны, дальше сами, я в гугол пошёл".

 ‎· how about yes 45
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^ (голосом Безоса)

 ‎· Valera Fooksman 6
Avatar for oxfv

Recently I learned that on March 8, 2012 there was an Amazon outage cause by widespread simultaneous bit-flipping in network cards with hardware-computed checksums. The bit flipping was caused by a magnetic storm caused by a spike in solar activity. This is both scary, poetic, and educational.

Avatar for oxfv

Huel Starter Kit - Includes 2 Pouches of Nutritionally Complete 100% Vegan Powdered Meal, Scoop, Shaker and Booklet.

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https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07B5BG46D

 ‎· Valera Fooksman
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Vanilla, too

 ‎· Valera Fooksman
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And that's where we put ХУЕЛ.

 ‎· Valera Fooksman
Avatar for oxfv

В этом году вырезал страшное и ужасное - пронзенное сердце. К Холуину сердце сгнило и было поедено мышами.

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Концептуально!

 ‎· Ошка
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символично и жизненно

 ‎· x01a1a
Avatar for oxfv

Употребление "etot" в мокуме раздражает изрядно. Какое-то застрявшее в привычках подсюсюкивание, не могу даже объяснить. С другой стороны, это вполне уместная замена self в объектном коде. "etot->run(speed, direction);"

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Вы просто не хотите быть bogach & zdorov!

 ‎· Count Caturday 30
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NET TAKOE!!!! TY - NET EXIST!

 ‎· отдел обуви для животных 10
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Я дома третий день в ответ на некоторые вопросы говорю "takoe", жене почему-то очень не нравится.

 ‎· антероградный Меркурий 2
Avatar for oxfv

One of the typical Silicon Valley offices next to my work has a sign in the window: "Streaming SQL for Apache Kafka". At first I thought this to be a great opportunity for slogan generation, in a form of "<verb> <technology> <preposition> <company> <product>". As in, "(streaming|building|pushing|stretching) (SQL|TCP|Containers|Ruby|Logs) (for|over|with|despite of) (Apache|Microsoft|Google) (Kafka|Hadoop|TensorFlow)". But then I saw the light. The schema is different! It is actually "Streaming <noun> for <Indian tribe> <European writer>". Because even Apache people have their own Kafka, and someone needs to stream SQL for him! For example:

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Streaming pendulums for Navajo Poe

 ‎· Valera Fooksman
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Streaming gods for Passamaquoddy Nietzsche

 ‎· Valera Fooksman
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Streaming tomahawks for Chemehuevi Dostoyevsky

 ‎· Valera Fooksman
Avatar for oxfv

Рассказал ребенку (8 лет) шутку, что нынешний год особенный. Если сложить год рождения и возраст, то получится 2018. Во-первых неправда, потому что у ребенка день рождения в этом году еще впереди. Во-вторых, у него заняло секунд пять раскусить. А есть ведь кто ведется.

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см. тж. "current year". (хотя эта шутка для 13+, конечно)

 ‎· Angry NPC 1
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^ Oh my god, this is great! https://knowyourmeme.com/photos/1061592-come-on-its-2015-current-year

 ‎· Valera Fooksman 3
Avatar for oxfv

В Амазоне работает 5 человек по фамилии Руденко. Одного из них зовут Хлиб. Другого зовут Йоги.

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Штиллерманов нет, но есть чувак по фамилии, чтобы не соврать, Штилияновштилиян. А звать его - Маринов. Пиздец.

 ‎· Valera Fooksman 12
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Казначеевых нету тоже. Но есть один подозрительный тип по имени Dmitrijs Kaznadzejs. У меня есть вопросы.

 ‎· Valera Fooksman 16
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@mastul: Есть тетка по имени Ma Cristina Stull.

 ‎· Valera Fooksman 6
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/тупится/

 ‎· сраная йенни 1
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Priorities

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the notices are per accordion

 ‎· 9000
Avatar for oxfv

It takes a village to raise an idiot.

Avatar for oxfv

Behold Schwab Bill Pay, the new low in banking system design! One day your password stops working all by itself, you try it multiple times an lock yourself out. You call, stay on hold, go through verification, they reset your password and send you a temporary one by regular mail. You get it in a week, log in and change to the new permanent password. You try to log in and the new password doesn't work. You call, stay on hold, go through verification, and find out that the password can't be longer than 8 characters (yes, really), except this is only enforced on login, not on password change. So they reset your password and send you a temporary one by regular mail. To be continued.

Avatar for oxfv

News flash from the Broken Assumptions department. Today's broken assumption: an apartment has one type of address. Country of interest: Egypt.

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One address is the typical (apt/bldg/street/city/zip). The other is based on the construction company's project plan (project/construction phase/bldg/apt). Both addresses point to the same exact unit and are perfectly interchangeable (even on govt documents like national ID).

 ‎· Valera Fooksman
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You think it's safe to assume an apartment _has_ an address?

 ‎· Count Caturday 6
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^ Sure. It may be an empty address though.

 ‎· Valera Fooksman
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@oxfv: well, you're kinda cheating with measure here, it's not even cardinality :) BTW, does Amazon deliver to empty addresses?

 ‎· Count Caturday
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It doesn't, but it also doesn't deliver to incomplete or wrong addresses. However, addresses are used not only for delivery, and other usages might be fine with incomplete, wrong, or even empty addresses.

 ‎· Valera Fooksman
Avatar for oxfv

Опрос!

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ссЫкотно

 ‎· Valera Fooksman 41
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^ Есть: http://lleo.me/dnevnik/2018/10/11_kulichi.html

 ‎· Valera Fooksman 2
Avatar for oxfv

The twins that started their (different) colleges not a month ago, both got sick today, and both panicked and called. The synchronicity is remarkable! Nevermind that the one that got accepted to a sorority had most likely a severe hangover (she admitted drinking too much vodka and later coffee, and she's not in a habit of eating), whereas the other one that didn't get accepted to a sorority just has fever, dehydration, and upset stomach.

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I also learned that every college has a Student Wellness Center where they will not only diagnose your hangover or fever but will also give you food and prescribe eating it. They know their clientele.

 ‎· Valera Fooksman 2
Avatar for oxfv

Тока что наняли в группу человека по фамилии Ганди. Дело обычное, но только звать его Viral. Ну зашибись теперь.

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First they ignore you. Then they laugh at you. Then they fight you. Then you cleanse them in the atomic fire. Then you win. (c)

 ‎· Chöd interval
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^ One hell of an exit strategy.

 ‎· Valera Fooksman 1
Avatar for oxfv

[х] Проплыть Алькатрас в восьмой раз.

Avatar for oxfv

"Никогда такого не было, и вот опять", or "déjà vu all over again". When I worked in Yandex they launched Turkey. Now, in Amazon, they just launched Turkey. What is it about Turkey?

Avatar for oxfv

Открытка пиггимаусу. В Америке коктейль Long Island Ice Tea - это такое древнее старье, что большинство барменов вообще не знают как его готовить и смотрят на тебя как на бесполезное ископаемое. Типа подтяжек или имени Эбенезер.

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А Old Fashioned-то знают?

 ‎· тяготѣніе къ желудю и корыту 1
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^^^^^^^ Вроде знают, но я не по бурбону, детально не проверял.

 ‎· Valera Fooksman
Avatar for oxfv

Saw a girl riding a horse on a horse trail while staring at her phone.

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Why not? As opposed to cars horses have working autopilot.

 ‎· ваш жратье 14
Avatar for oxfv

Несанкционированный митинг по-калифорнийски.

Avatar for oxfv

Blast from the past. Nevermind that the cord is detached, it could probably be reattached any minute and then! Then!

Avatar for oxfv

TIL: майский жук = cockchafer

Avatar for oxfv

What did you achieve at 33? CHLOË McCARDEL swam English Channel (that's 34km or 21 miles) 19 times, double English Channel 3 times, triple English Channel once, and attempted quadruple English Channel. She holds the record for the longest continuous ocean swim at 124 km (41 hours non-stop). I mean. Wow. https://chloemccardel.com/

Avatar for oxfv

Of course I can't find it on the web but I saw a bumper sticker today that looked something like this:
Love Fear
Everything Nothing
So, brothers and sisters, love fear. Because everything is nothing.

Of course I can't find it on the web but I saw a bumper sticker today that looked something like this:
Love Fear
Everything Nothing
So, brothers and sisters, love fear. Because everything is nothing.

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everyboby = nobody

 ‎· dixi
Avatar for oxfv

I have a weird story about freshly departed Burt Reynolds. At some point of my life I realized that my brain has two bad pixels: I seem to fail to remember certain facts. One of the pixels was the name of Burt Reynolds: whenever I tried to recall it I always drew a blank, and it took me some effort to bring up the name (while I remembered the face and the movies just fine). Finally, I realized that my problem with remembering his name is systemic (it always gets stored in the same bad pixel), and I remembered that fact. The fact that I can't remember Burt Reynold's name because of the memory glitch. And THAT memory got stored in a good pixel, so now I remember Burt Reynold's name because I remember that I couldn't retain it before.

The contents of the second bad pixel has been lost forever, I'm afraid.

I have a weird story about freshly departed Burt Reynolds. At some point of my life I realized that my brain has two bad pixels: I seem to fail to remember certain facts. One of the pixels was the name of Burt Reynolds: whenever I tried to recall it I always drew a blank, and it took me some effort to bring up the name (while I remembered the face and the movies just fine). Finally, I realized that my problem with remembering his name is systemic (it always gets stored in the same bad pixel), and I remembered that fact. The fact that I can't remember Burt Reynold's name because of the memory glitch. And THAT memory got stored in a good pixel, so now I remember Burt Reynold's name because I remember that I couldn't retain it before.

The contents of the second bad pixel has been lost forever, I'm afraid.

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